I plan to look at and pick apart some of the more notarized
theories associated with the 2012 theories of conspiracy.
On December 21st
or 23rd of 2012 the world will end: This one is one of the
most farfetched that I have heard and is easily explained away. First off,
let’s use Christmas or New Years as a reference point since they are both
recognized internationally and are easier to explain the point I am about to
make. Now let’s look at this logically, my friend lives in Australia and every
year I get a drunken phone call from him wishing me a happy new year at 11:00AM
the day off, why you may ask, well because Australia is 13 hours ahead of the
East coast of the US and in particular the east coast of the US is 4 hours
ahead of the west coast. Why do I make this point, well its simple, basing the
fact that the world would end on December 21st or 23rd,
what time zone will it take place in? It can’t take place in all of them
because that would mean the world would come to an end in a domino effect sort
of way. And if the world is going to end I think it would do it all in one
shot. As well the date and time is open for interpretation based upon who you
are talking or listening too, if this was a solid date calculated by the
Mayans, why the discrepancy?
This is said to
happen based upon a Mayan Long Count calendar: Really? Is this who we
are going to listen to as the fate of our world? If this is the case then
someone has been watching Alien vs Predator way too much. I will admit that the
Mayan’s were very intelligent people and were advanced for their time and
geographical location, but where are they now? Their culture is all but gone
and the Mayan people are all but faded out of existence. Yes, the Spanish came
in and wiped them out with disease, but the fact of the matter is, if they were
that advanced they would have been on the same playing level as the Spaniards,
they would have created gun powder and weapons for protection rather than
worshiping a number of different gods that didn’t exist. They would sacrificed and wear jackets of
human flesh in order to appease the god of the land so that they would have
fertile crops. Really? This is who we are taking global advice from? Heck if
that’s the case then maybe we should take more stock into listening to such
people as Ed Gein or Jeffery Dahmer, because they were pretty much doing the
same thing.
One other point I would like to make about the Mayan
calendar is that the few Mayan people who are around today don’t even put much
stock into it and it was their ancestors who created it. Now if their own
people aren’t worrying about the 2012 thing then why in the world are we?
Galactic
Alignment: This theory is based upon the fact that the planets of the
galaxy will all be in perfect alignment thus causing an end to the existence
that we know of or will usher in the world of the New Age. Now the planets have
aligned in the past and oh wow look we are still here, it is a very cool thing
that the planets come into alignment and is an interesting fact, but nothing I
would base my life on and around. As for the coming of the new age, go to Border
or Barnes and Nobles because they have whole sections on new age so I hate to
burst your bubble, but the new age movement has been around for years and is part
of the culture of the world already, just look at Nostradamus and his
fortunetelling, you don’t get anymore new age than that. However I feel that
Nostradamus is a crack pot in his own rite as well, but that is for another
time and debate.
Planet Nibiru:
This is the theory that a giant planet called Nibiro or Planet X (very Godzilla
like I might add) will collide into the earth and destroy it. I don’t know why
I am going to waste my time on this one, but this is one of the most ridiculous
ones I have heard yet. Now according to astrologers there will be an object
called 433 Eros to pass by the earth narrowly missing us at nearly 17 million
miles, yes I said 17 million miles. Oh and by the way Eros is only about 20
miles in diameter at its widest part, wow…we better watch out for that one,
note sarcasm. Now if both professional and amateur astrologers are able to see
this two mile rock that will pass us by 17 million miles don’t you think
someone would have spotted a freakin planet hurtling towards the planet earth?
Web Bot:
Ok now I know I said the Planet X thing was ridiculous, but I may have to give
it to the Web Bot theory for overall stupidity. Now the web bot’s purpose is to
scour the internet looking for key words with emotion and to somehow create
stock trends and predictions on both natural and manmade disasters. So let’s get this straight, two mega nerds
created a program to randomly search words on the internet that puts them into
a calculation that the “inventors” don’t share with anyone only to sell their
results via their website? In my mind they have to be some of the best con men
or certifiable geek wackos walking this earth. They claim they predicted 9-11
as well as the Dick Cheney hunting accident, if you boil it all down and look
it at it with a clear mind then you will see that this is nothing more than a
giant electronic magic 8 ball. “Answer unclear, try again later.”
Well I think I will end this column/editorial on this note,
if you take any stock in these things other than an interest to see how people
think then you need to crawl under a rock and not come out till you can get
along with society. There will always be end of the world theories and no one
will ever know when that will take place. You need to live your life to the
fullest and help make it a better place for yourself and others. If you worry
about what might be, then your best bet is to get a job as a tele-marketer and
never leave your house. As always, if you have an opinion with what I said then
you are more than welcome to e-mail your rebuttal to me and I will gladly tell
you that you’re wrong.
Be safe and pick a time zone,
John Cannon
John Cannon
No comments:
Post a Comment